The Magistrate's Blog (2005-2012)

This blog has migrated to www.magistratesblog.blogspot.co.uk This blog is anonymous, and Bystander's views are his and his alone. Where his views differ from the letter of the law, he will enforce the letter of the law because that is what he has sworn to do. If you think that you can identify a particular case from one of the posts you are wrong. Enough facts are changed to preserve the truth of the tale but to disguise its exact source.

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Location: Near London, United Kingdom

The blog is written by a retired JP, with over 30 years' experience on the Bench.

Saturday, February 12, 2005

Black Humour From The Old Bill

A Met PC was on his way to an urgent call in the Area Car. In his haste he cut a corner rather tightly. Unfortunately there was another police car coming the other way, on its way back from a routine enquiry. The ensuing collision wrote off both vehicles, but injuries were mercifully minor.

The PC concerned is now stuck with the nickname Chi-Chi.

Because he fucks Pandas.

(Note for the youthful) I have just realised that most people under 35 won't have heard of Chi-Chi. It was one of the pandas at London Zoo - their sex lives, or the lack thereof, were of great interest to the Press for quite a while.