The Magistrate's Blog (2005-2012)

This blog has migrated to www.magistratesblog.blogspot.co.uk This blog is anonymous, and Bystander's views are his and his alone. Where his views differ from the letter of the law, he will enforce the letter of the law because that is what he has sworn to do. If you think that you can identify a particular case from one of the posts you are wrong. Enough facts are changed to preserve the truth of the tale but to disguise its exact source.

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Location: Near London, United Kingdom

The blog is written by a team, who may or may not be JPs, but all of whom are interested in the Magistrates' Courts.

Thursday, August 25, 2005


A colleague was undergoing her appraisal in the chair. The appraiser was sitting in the well of the court, and one of her colleagues ('wingers') was on her second-ever sitting.

Midway through the morning the winger's phone started to ring loudly in her handbag. She turned scarlet, and fumbled unsuccessfully to turn it off. The chairman coolly paused the court's proceedings and announced that the bench would retire for just a couple of minutes. They returned with the phone firmly switched off.

During the debrief at the end of the session, the appraiser mentioned the incident and said that the chairman had handled matters with dignity and that the court had been disrupted to a minimal extent. "So that was okay then?" she enquired. "Well, replied the appraiser, "There was one small problem. When the phone rang your colleague said 'shit!' so loudly that we heard it right at the back of the court".