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The Magistrate's Blog (2005-2012)

This blog has migrated to www.magistratesblog.blogspot.co.uk This blog is anonymous, and Bystander's views are his and his alone. Where his views differ from the letter of the law, he will enforce the letter of the law because that is what he has sworn to do. If you think that you can identify a particular case from one of the posts you are wrong. Enough facts are changed to preserve the truth of the tale but to disguise its exact source.

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Location: Near London, United Kingdom

The blog is written by a retired JP, with over 30 years' experience on the Bench.

Saturday, April 29, 2006

Apocrypha (16)

When I win the Lottery I shall have the Queen's printers prepare me a document, laid out by the finest graphic artists, and on the most expensive hand-laid parchment.

It will be a re-telling of the tale of "The Little Boy Who Cried Wolf".

Once it has been printed, and bound in calfskin, I shall present a copy to each and every one of the people who control our motorway matrix signs, and urge them to commit it to memory.

For those who even then fail to get the point, may I just say:-

AFTER THE TENTH SPURIOUS WARNING PEOPLE STOP TAKING NOTICE OF YOUR SIGNS! WATCH THE CCTV AND TURN THE BLOODY THINGS OFF WHEN THE EMERGENCY HAS PASSED!

Get it, chaps?

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